A Successful Raper

He's not, just in case anyone's getting excitedly litigious. (Ooo - good word. Litigious...)

'Ruler'

No cause for 'alarm', I'm 'sure'.

Cow Trouble

I can't actually remember what we were doing, but those cows in section C certainly weren't supposed to be enjoying themselves quite as much as that.

Takes me back to our Science exam at college. We'd all agreed to answer the question 'Name a positive effect of friction' with 'orgasm'. Sadly, the question didn't come up.

Overenthusiastic History

Pink Paradise

Rabbit, actually...

...but the castle and repelling soldiers are a nice touch. Good job you extended its jaw and claws - giant rabbits simply aren't equipped to cope with early medieval weaponry...

U Stink

I think it's 'stink', anyway. I'd be surprised if any of them had the vocabulary to accuse others of slinking, and the idea of a skink probably hasn't occurred to a single occupant of the school under the age of twelve. Which is all of them, yes. Our nature table has two pigeon eggshells, four acorns, a dead dragonfly and three dried mushrooms, none of which are psychotropically active in any way shape or form. We know this because one of the teaching assistants forgot her 'nutritious' cereal bar last week and idly gnawed one of them to stave off the pangs of mingled dread and hunger during Numeracy. Apparently, the world simply came into sharp focus and all made sense, so a bit of a loss all round, really.

Donkey Feet

That's neat, that's neat, that's neat, that's neat, I really love your tiger feet.

That's neat, that's neat, that's neat, that's neat, I really love your penis feet.

Irony

And You Know Why?

Ah, the gentle smack of desperation - or was it a thousand teacher's palms all simultaneously colliding with their foreheads in disbelief?